It turns out that all the rumours about Fort Knox being empty were completely unfounded. In fact, not only was the place filled with treasure, something better than precious metals were discovered – a ...

Pastor Mark’s new “accountability and discipleship plan” has totally backfired, after not a single parishioner replied to his email asking them to keep track of their hours of Bible reading and ...

After Elon Musk accidentally slashed the job of US President this week, Donald Trump has sought work elsewhere – the marketing department of the NHL. “After fomenting hatred between countries that ...

As of just a few days ago, young Timothy Reimer, 8, of Mountain Lake could identify several large bodies of water and many of the highest mountain peaks, which made him the country’s most ...

Winkler is finally getting its own Costco store, which will be conveniently located just an hour and a half away in Winnipeg. “Finally, Winkler’s getting a Costco!” proclaimed local man John Penner.

In a mass display of solidarity, Canadians have banded together to eat more than 80 million heaping plates of delicious poutine in a single day. “Plus we unveiled a massive Canadian flag on our front ...

Uncle Dave has been posting 7 to 10 political memes every day now for the past 10 years or so and can’t for the life of him figure out why no one is engaging with his content. “Got 3 likes on that ...

Area man Garth Eby, 39, has just begun a yearlong project to dissemble every stitch of furniture in his house and replace all the screws with Robertsons. “I’m starting with the kitchen cabinets, ...

Days before the upcoming election, the federal government has committed upwards of $80 billion to build a high-speed rail line in the five mile stretch between Morden and Winkler. “There will be stops ...

Super Bowl ratings tanked this Sunday as all 40 million Canadians boycotted the show in favour of watching Grey Cup reruns. “I’ve got the 1989 Grey Cup on a VHS tape somewhere I think,” said Bobby ...

Even the Canadian satire industry has not escaped Trump’s trade war, with an expected 25% tariff to be slapped on all exports of sarcasm and mockery. “We don’t need Canada’s jokes. We have our own ...